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How many times you saw the message from that friend that has so many parties planned and a full month of events, and he or she is inviting you to one of them and you, A) delete the message like you never got it, B) reply after a week that you were sick, C) just immediately say – sorry I have to do some stuff that I already planned months ago? We all know that A, B and C are all lies, right? You will be on the sofa, watching Netflix and having a bit of a FOMO (Fear of Missing Out). But, FOMO, will not be stronger than your fear of seeing all the people that you would see if you would go. So, Netflix it is.

Hello, my name is Selena, and welcome to my podcast Alive and awake. I am so happy that you made it! 😊 For those listening for the first time, I am a molecular biologist and physiologist, with a PhD in Biochemistry and a Postdoc year in structural biology, cryoEM. Many, including myself, would call me a scientist. But I am far more than that. I am a wife, a daughter, a sister, a friend, a spirit, a child of God, a creation of stardust. I am basically you, because we are one.

The scenario that I have mentioned in the beginning, I have done it, yes. I would go to the party, with full anxiety on, panic attacks one after another and then I would feel miserable that I went in the first place. Also, I would consume alcohol more then I normally would. All because I was nervous and I needed something to relax me, so I can talk to people. Basically, when the evening was over, and I was back home, my brain was overthinking every word I said – was this correct, maybe was to much, what if now they are offended, what if they say that I am a bitch, probably they will, I should have never gone there in the first place.

There are several types of anxiety disorders, and those are: specific phobia, social phobia, separation anxiety, generalized anxiety disorder (GAD), panic disorder, agoraphobia, obsessive compulsive disorder (OCD) and posttraumatic stress disorder (PTSD). Social anxiety disorder is an intense, constant fear of being observed, judged by others. This fear can and often does affect school, work, and other daily activities. It can make it hard to make and keep friends. The good news is, social anxiety disorder is treatable. Please, if you feel that you are in danger call 911, or if you feel that you experience any of the symptoms that will be mentioned during the episode, seek professional help.

Social anxiety is a common type of anxiety disorder. It has been said that it appears more in females then in males, but from my experience, talking to people, gender does not matter. The fear of being judged, being scrutinized, being laughed at, is equally distributed. It is just shown in different ways among different people, depending on the character, not gender. And fear is what drives this battle. As any anxiety type, also here, the amygdala is in charge. Situations are so intense that they are beyond the control of the reason and the person has only two choices, to freeze or to flie. It can come from something in the situation like public speaking, but also at the cashier in the supermarket. And it can repeat itself over and over and over, that the person starts to avoid interactions with other individuals, in hope that it will pass over time. Sometimes it might. Most of the time, you need to work much harder than just waiting for it to pass. This is one of the disorders where medications are not necessarily needed but probably would be given for the first few months. The main thing is having someone who would be your best friend, your support, who will have your back. That person is your medicine. Why? Because when all the fear kicks in, and you need to leave, which is fine, instead of panicking alone and taking a pill, you will have someone to take you home and breath with you, and tell you that all is fine. Social anxiety is solved by actually being social. Baby steps.

What are the signs?

Emotional and physical symptoms.

  • Blush, sweat, or tremble.
  • Have a rapid heart rate.
  • Feeling of “mind going blank,” or feeling sick to the stomach.
  • Have a rigid body posture, or speak with an overly soft voice.
  • Find it difficult to make eye contact, be around people they don’t know, or talk to people in social situations, even when they want to.
  • Feeling self-conscious or being afraid that people will judge them negatively.
  • Avoid places where there are other people.

What are the causes and how it can be treated?

Even though the possibility for social anxiety to arise is greater in the late childhood, I think that there are no rules. It can come earlier, in kindergarten age or later, in mid 30s. And it is a trigger with a mixture of biological and environmental factors.

  • Genetics. Anxiety disorders tend to run in the family. Yet, it is not proven still, how much genes are involved.
  • Brain structure. A structure in the brain called the amygdala plays a role in controlling the fear response. People who have an overactive amygdala may have a heightened fear response, causing increased anxiety in social situations.
  • Environment. Certain situations that we have been through can become an obstacle and we can develop a significant anxiety.

What are the risk factors?

Family history. Negative experiences (teasing, bullying, rejection, ridicule or humiliation). Temperament. Change in the social or work environments. Physical appearance that draws attention (facial disfigurement, stuttering or tremors due to Parkinson’s disease).

Complications.

  • Low self-esteem
  • Trouble being assertive
  • Negative self-talk
  • Hypersensitivity to criticism
  • Poor social skills
  • Isolation and difficult social relationships
  • Low academic and employment achievement
  • Substance abuse, such as drinking too much alcohol
  • Suicide or suicide attempts

Prevention

Get help early!!!! It is important to talk about your problems, no matter how uncomfortable they seem to you! It will help you live!

Reduce stress! Keep a journal! Say a prayer! Be grateful! Manage time to have more time for yourself and your family and friends!

Find a hobby that you like! Read a book instead of watching TV all the time! Go for a walk!

Avoid unhealthy substance use! They will increase your feelings of negative self-talk and hypersensitivity!

Treatment

Psychotherapy, or talking therapy, helps people understand their experiences and develop effective coping methods. There are many types of psychotherapy, including: cognitive behavioural therapy (CBT), interpersonal therapy, psychodynamic therapy, family therapy.

Medications Antidepressants, antianxiety medications and beta-blockers.

Nowadays, doctors are also using ketamine and TSM (transcranial magnetic stimulation) to treat depression and anxiety disorders.

Nutrition. Intake of food rich with magnesium and/or magnesium supplements is very important. Another supplement that seems to be important in children with ADHD was effective on conduct problems, social problems, and anxiety/shy scores compared with placebo intake is vitamin D. Low serum Mg2+ levels increase NMDA receptor activity thus enhancing Ca2+ and Na+ influx and neuronal excitability. For these reasons, a deficiency of Mg2+ has been hypothesized in many neurological disorders, such as migraine, chronic pain, epilepsy, Alzheimer’s, Parkinson’s, and stroke, as well as anxiety and depression.

Food reach in Magnesium: pumpkin seeds, chia seeds, almonds, spinach, cashews, peanuts, soymilk, rolled oats, bread, whole wheat, avocado, brown rice, milk.

It seems that every year we are getting more solutions, but the problem gets more severe as well. It is heart-breaking seeing a child having a hard time because he or she thinks no one understands or no one cares or everyone judges. The world looks cruel and evil. And it should not. At least not while you are a kid.

Today’s quote is by Thomas Jefferson: I like the dreams of the future better than the history of the past.

Me too. And I like them anxiety-free. I wish you a wonderful day and a wonderful week. Fearless and hopeful! Until next time.

Lots of love.

Selena

Music: Podcast theme music by Transistor.fm